Am I exercising discernment or am I being judgmental?

I have been reading through portions of Dave Swavely’s book, “Who are you to judge? The Dangers of Judging and Legalism,” for an upcoming lesson in our youth group. Their have been sections in this book which I have not fully agreed with (especially his conclusions in Appendix A); but all in all it has been a convicting book. The principles in this book have caused me to think about my own life quite a bit.

The Bible tells us to use discernment. We are not to be naïve or unwise in the Christian life. There are times when biblical love will need to discriminate or even call one to repentance. Yet in my own life, sometimes I classify my sinful judgments as biblical discernment or something nobler. Clearly the Bible warns us against sinful judging (Matt. 7; Romans 14:10, 13; James 4:11-12). To help apply this truth Swavely offers up a few Biblical principles for everyone to consider:

1. Is this opinion based firmly on Scripture, or on my ideas and preferences?

Personal convictions are fine but I need to be careful not to impose these on others in a sinful way.

2. Does the formation of this opinion include any judgments about the person’s thoughts or motives?

This is the area I am most guilty in. I don’t think the best about someone and thus show a deficiency in biblical love. Swavely writes, “We simply cannot know for sure what people are thinking or desiring, unless they tell us.” The book reminded me that someone’s motives may be right, even when what they say is wrong. Later he writes, “Even when you are evaluating someone’s actions, which is a legitimate practice, be careful not to allow opinions or implications about motives to creep in as well.”

3. Am I missing any facts that are necessary for an accurate evaluation?

Proverbs 18:13 and 18:17 speak to this issue very well. Sometimes I am way to quick in my rush to judgment. Have i taken someones word on something without first talking to that person? Have i done everything i could to get the facts straight and to hear both sides of the story?

4. How would I want this person to think of me if the roles were reversed?

Ouch! This is something I don’t think about nearly enough (Matt. 7:12; Luke 6:31). Dave writes, “If you are not careful to avoid sinful judgments and eager to think the best about others. You will find yourself under suspicion by others.”

5. How can I show the grace of the cross to this person? (Eph 4:32)

Could love overlook this offense? Is it necessary to bring this issue up? These are some of the questions I need to ask myself before moving forward on something.

This process is all about cross-examining your judgments before you deliver a negative verdict. Sometimes what I call “discernment” is in fact “a judgmental attitude” which is not pleasing to the Lord. These 5 questions should help protect me from being overly judgmental. By God’s grace I will continue to grow in this area and I trust you will as well.